Kinship Caregiving: You Are Definitely Not Alone.

Kinship Caregiving: You Are Definitely Not Alone.: How many kinship caregivers are out there in the U.S. right now? It is a difficult number to measure and more difficult to define. If you ...

You Are Definitely Not Alone.

How many kinship caregivers are out there in the U.S. right now? It is a difficult number to measure and more difficult to define. If you include part-time kinship caregivers- a grandparent or other family member who helps fill in because a child's parent is deceased, incarcerated, or uninvolved, the numbers reach almost 8 million children!

I found the information below on the Generations United website: (thttp://www2.gu.org/OURWORK/Grandfamilies/GrandfamiliesStatistics.aspx)

The Grandchildren

• 7.8 million children live in households headed by grandparents or other relatives. These households include those both those where the children's parents may or may not be present.
• 2.7 million children (4%) of all U.S. children are being raised in grandfamilies or kinship care situations.

The Grandparents

• 2.7 million grandparents are responsible for most of the basic needs of their grandchildren.
• 60% of these grandparent caregivers are in the workforce.
• 21% live below the poverty line.
• 36% have provided care for the children for more than 5 years.
• Grandfamilies save tax payers more than $6.5 billion each year by keeping children out of foster care.

So as you can see, you really are not alone.  And yet, when I meet with a kinship family in therapy  for the first time, I am often struck by how alone and isolated these families are. How they don't know any other families like their own and they usually say it's because they are just too tired or too overwhelmed to find and make these connections.  

Sometimes, I believe kinship families live for years in shock. Shock that their kinship kids' mom or dad has disappeared, or died, or gone to jail. Sometimes, they didn't even know the child existed. After they dig themselves out of the initial shock, it is all they can do just to keep their heads above water.  

But making connections with others, even just one another kinship caregiver, can have incredible benefits to mental health. In my community, there are support groups for kinship caregivers. There are also loads of online groups and resources and if you can't manage getting out to an actual group, or there isn't one in your community, think about plugging in. 

Feeling more connected can make you less critical of yourself, find an outlet for your grief, and maybe even playmates for your kinship kid.  

Try these online resources first, both have comprehensive lists of fact sheets and info on each state:


www.grandsplace.org
www.gu.org

No matter where you live, if you are in a kinship caregiving relationship, feel free to email me. I am happy to help you locate resources in your own community.

Karen N. Chaudhry, LCSW is a therapist who is committed to supporting children and families in kinship relationships. She sees teens, individuals, couples, and families in Northern Virginia. Visit her website at: www.thriveandchange.com